Hey there, guys. Are you tired of feeling like a failure when your sweetheart is having a bad hair emotional day? Nothing seems to work very well, does it? Well, want to know the secret?
DO NOTHING! Well, that isn’t totally true, but almost. When a woman is upset about something or has had a bad day at work or with the kids, she has to talk about it. HAS to talk about it until she is done. I know that might seem like an eternity to you because you already have the answer after about 30 seconds, right? WRONG.
Women do not want answers believe it or not. I know. I know. Who wouldn’t want the answer when they have a problem? Women. Trust me on this. What do you think will make them happy and truly appreciate you? Listening. Making eye contact as if they are the only woman in the Universe while you simply listen to them. Nodding your head tells them you understand and even if you feel the boss may have been right, don’t say it. Not the time for truth-telling. Only listening and empathizing for now. Later, she may ask you what you think, would do or might have done in her situation, but that’s for her to ask and not for you to volunteer.
It feels like it goes against everything you’ve been taught or experienced in your world. It is the total opposite of everything you are good at and know to do. So, practice and time will prove to you that it is well worth the effort (or lack of doing something effort at least).
Finally, when she is over the anger and finally takes a deep breath, take her hand and just hold it. Or, try giving her a big sincere hug. You may feel her melt into your arms and take a deep sigh that says, “Thank you. I needed that.” You will make her very happy.
And ladies…if you’re reading this, remember to tell him “Thank you. I really appreciated your listening.”
For more tips on how to make your woman happy, give me a call or email me to schedule a Complimentary Strategy Session that will bring that smile back to her face…and who knows what might happen!
Donna Bailey, MS
Coach, Speaker, Writer and Expert in Dating and Relationships for “Grown-ups”
Donna’s Big Red Chair