Cook For Me and I’ll Follow You Anywhere!

carmel-vallley…What I missed was checking in all day with my person, daydreaming about him, and watching TV together at night. There, I’ve said it: I wanted someone to text all day and watch TV with.”

Anne Lamott, Small Victories


Well, I miss more than that…enough said. But, I agree with my favorite author of the soul that it’s that connection,  being a part of someone’s life that I miss most of all. Most especially, I want to share my day…”How was your day today, sweetheart?” kind of thing. So, pardon me while I tell you about my most amazing day, OK?


I am writing that illusive book about love and staying in a beautiful Zen home of some dear friends. If you haven’t ever been to Carmel, I’m just here to tell you this must be about as perfect a creation of nature as there is anywhere in the world. Ah, lucky me.


My bed faces the canyon so early morning creatures abound. Some mornings deer graze on grasses, their ears perked and on alert. Big bunnies hop through the bracken at dawn and dusk. When I come it seems the coyotes know it. This morning, I wish you could have seen them…two big coyotes staring at me as if to say, “Welcome back!” How’s that for a day’s beginning?!


I headed out for a hike out in the Valley fully intending to just be quiet and let the kinks unravel in my overworked brain. Ah, but someone had a different idea. The trail was full of the most incredible people…friendly and wanting to share their happiness with me. An onslaught of Golden Retrievers made my heart feel like it was going to explode. And then I met Hal and his dog, “Bertie”.


We stopped to talk, “Bertie” happy to have a starving for love dog lover rubbing his ears. Hal asked me what I was doing out so early. I guess he couldn’t see my brain tangles. When I told him I was here to write a book on love, he wanted to know more. Seems he was a chef and married Janie 29 years ago. Years back he wrote a book too called Feeding Janie, which sadly, is out of print now. But when he told me the story, I almost dissolved.


For 29 years he has cooked a gourmet meal for Janie every night they have been home together. She sits at the bar, talks about the day while he cooks. He didn’t just cook the meal, he paid exquisite attention to the presentation just the same way he did in his gourmet restaurant for all those customers. You see, he said, Janie was well worth the effort.


Tears in my eyes, I told him how much I treasure a man who cooks for me. More than anything else, cooking a beautiful meal for me is the ultimate act of love. Then he made my day…”If I were a single man, I would ask you out right now.” “And, I would say ‘Yes’.”, I told him.


The sky was beautiful blue and the sound of the leaves crackled under my feet as I sat in a swing mesmerized by life. The book…well, I’m getting there.


So, that was my day. Thank you for asking.  “Tell me about yours”, I would say to him. Then I’d really listen.


If you are tired of watching sunsets alone, and willing to do whatever it takes to find someone to be there at the end of your day, I can guide you all the way.    510-817-4242

Donna Bailey, MS

Coach, Speaker, Writer

Donna’s Big Red Chair

Dating and Relationships for “Grown-ups”


  1. Barbara Blum on October 9, 2016 at 11:36 am

    Love, love this story that just happened as it was meant to do. Sweet. I’m teary eyed for you and your encounter! A blessing

    • admin on October 11, 2016 at 1:57 pm

      Thanks, Barbara

      It was a joy to meet him and hear that story. It’s surprising how often things like that happen in this world.

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