What Does Your Driver’s License Say About Finding Love?

Those of us unfortunate enough to be in the “dating pool” these days are having the perpetual discussion, debate or argument depending on which friend you are talking with over a glass of wine. It goes like this…

Hourglass“I just want to meet him ‘naturally’,  not online. You know, like at work or church,  some event thing, or something like that. Maybe someone introduces us? I just want it to happen naturally.”


I couldn’t agree more.  First of all, it saves me about forty dollars a month and that is no small thing. Do you ever really add up the cost of putting yourself out there as a one-dimensional creature with a couple of photos taken way too close up? Then there’s your therapist bill when you begin writing your profile and all your dank, dark self doubt jumps up like some Jack- in- the- Box from the 50’s. Add up the emotional and financial costs and you have one expensive search. You had better hope something or someone comes out of all this.


What does it take? I hate to tell you what you don’t want to hear but it takes time and exposure. Not of things that at this age shouldn’t be exposed, but being visible to others who want love just as much as you do.


Ask yourself how many times in a week or a month you are out and about where it’s likely you will strike up a conversation with some stranger. If you see Mr. Handsome in Starbucks, are you going to walk up to him and say, “Hi”? What are the odds of finding your next love just by chance? Now, take a deep breath and look at your driver’s license. How many years have you been here already? You really might want to increase your odds and do a search for a dating website you like. There are thousands of people just waiting to meet you and trust me, much like going to a 12-Step program, everyone there is there for the same reason.  Get yourself off that sofa right now and at least begin.

Encourage someone you know. Forward this blog to a lonely friend who needs to get going!

510-817-4242 or donna@donnasbigredchair.love

I am happy to be your guide, cheerleader and hold your hand once you are off the sofa!

Just pick up the phone and give me a call to set up our Strategy Session to see if we are a match.

Donna Bailey, MS

Coach, Speaker, Writer and Expert in Dating and Relationships for Grown-ups

Donna’s Big Red  Chair


  1. Bill Carrothers on September 6, 2016 at 12:46 pm

    Donna, the ladies I meet “naturally” are far more outgoing and accepting of me just as I am.

    • admin on September 6, 2016 at 1:30 pm


      That makes perfect sense to me. When we are fortunate enough to meet “naturally”, we are more than two-dimensional and we don’t get stuck on the photos or have to make as many assumptions. There are so many things that can get in the way of meeting a really special person when we can’t see or talk with them at the initial meeting. And yet, what I think you know I am saying is, don’t wait to just meet someone by chance. Use as many ways as you can to meet one another. What do you have to loose if you do all those things? And, sadly, some people just aren’t out and about looking!

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