Even when we can’t remember our own birthday or the day our children were born, none of us ever forgets what February 14 is all about.
What does this Valentine’s Day look like for you?
A. You have a dinner reservation at your favorite restaurant (which means the man you love thought ahead…how sweet is that?).
B. You plan on going to bed before dark so you don’t have to eat by yourself in your apartment.
C. Your fingers, toes and legs are crossed, hoping the guy you have been dating will ask you out…and maybe bring you one of those “The Bachelor” roses.
D. You just got back from purchasing a dozen darts and plan to go to Safeway and pop every one of those friggin’ Valentine’s Day Mylar balloons!
If you answered A, I hope you feel the sheer joy and gratitude of being in a loving relationship with a very thoughtful man. My advice is to stop reading this blog right now and go pick out your Valentine’s Day outfit!
Any other answer…well, here is my best wisdom on this absolutely “abusive” holiday. Think Hallmark. They invented this day that has become the number one day for florists nationwide. And be grateful that you won’t be standing in line at a restaurant that has overbooked and overcharged. I know, you wouldn’t mind the wait, right?
Return to your sweet self. On this day you need more than anything to find ways to nurture and love yourself. Here are some things that have worked for me over the years…and believe me, I have spent many Valentine’s Days without a life partner:
1. Invite your girlfriends over who are also single and buy LOTS of chocolate. Give each of them a V Day gift that says, “Even if I had a lover, I would never desert you for him/her”.
2. Make a list of people you love and who love you. Children, friends, co-workers, your local grocer, the guy at the wine bar that serves you that fabulous Merlot, the local hangout where you go for pasta when you are exhausted, even ex-boyfriends who still love you.
3. List as many things as you can for which you are grateful.
4. Buy yourself flowers and a lovely candle and light it while you enjoy dinner and a good Netflix movie. Yes, you can select a Chick Flick and cry your eyes out. Feelings are encouraged.
There is no substitute for love, and some years it simply must come from ourselves. Have courage and faith that if you really want a wonderful life partner, you can have that. For this one day, remember that he/she is out there getting through yet another Valentine’s Day and keeping the fire lit that will help him/her find you.